Tag Archive for 'Simon Cowell'


Simon Cowell got like, everyone who’s anyone, to remake REM’s Everybody Hurts to help out Haiti. The video is totally behind the music, and I don’t mean that in the way that means it gives you background and inside scoop on the song. I mean it’s literally behind. The pictures don’t go with the artist. BUT, everyone is eventually accounted for.

Most annoying line – Mariah Carey. BY FAR.

Best performance – Robbie Williams, whose line is just before the very end when the entire group sings together.


The Next Big Thing


I don’t know much about the X-Factor other than that it appears to be a talent show on which Simon Cowell smirks a lot.  I don’t think it’s aired here in the states, but after seeing this audition of some dude name Danyl, I wish it were.

This guy is AMAZING.  And adorable.  And just the most natural performer ever.  And if he doesn’t win whatever this show is and become hugely rich and successful, I will be SHOCKED.

Holy wow:

The Judges Mourn Paula, And Victoria Beckham SMILES


It’s really kind of adorable how sad Simon seems over Paula not being there.  But riiiiight when you start sort of thinking, “Aww – it DOES sort of suck that she’s gone” then BLAMMO – cut to Victoria Beckham being positively adorable about filling in.

She’s going to completely fabulousize the crap out of Idol this season.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!


What sort of unfair angelic higher power is hovering around Simon Cowell such that he gets offered ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY FOUR MILLION DOLLARS A YEAR to sit and look smug on American Idol next season, while I resort to pleading with people on my facebook fan page to notice the ads on The Mock Dock in the hopes that I can make $.000002 in a month?

Because if this is some sort of angelic higher power that I can lease or rent-to-own or put on layaway, I would very much like to get some information about it.

Does. Not. Compute.

“Like a dog meowing.”

Yup – I’d say that’s about right.

I Need To Start Watching This Show Via Satellite

I know you guys are probably like, “OK Mock – enough with the Britain’s Got Talent clips already” but I cannot help myself. I love this show. And now, in addition to already having one completely gorgeous female judge, they’ve added a second, and so it’s two gorgeous female judges and two snooty Englishmen, and it’s a winning combination.

This precious little girl comes out in her precious little tutu and starts dancing a precious little dance, but when she started I thought, “Wow – this is cute but it’s certainly not talent show-worthy.” And then they flash to Simon looking kind of annoyed and then all of a sudden, this precious girl opens her mouth.

And it’s magic.

The fact that I couldn’t love the soundtrack of My Fair Lady any more notwithstanding, I cannot get ENOUGH of Simon’s reactions to contestants who surprise him in some way. It’s like he’s this mean devil of a person most of the time, but when that completely involuntary smile flashes on his face, it’s like the Grinch’s heart is melting right in front of you. I LOVE it.


I May Be Way Off Base Here…

…but I’m guessing these guys are gay. It’s just a hunch though.

WHY, oh why isn’t Simon Cowell judging this??

My Love For Simon Cowell Has Just Increased By A Factor Of A Billion

So an alert and astute mockdocker sent me this clip from this week’s episode of Britain’s Got Talent, and I have to tell you, the first minute or so I was utterly underwhelmed. And then Simon Cowell intervened, and magic happened.

This little boy is PRECIOUS, and owes pretty much the rest of his entire life to Simon. And the wink that Simon gives him at the end is so completely adorable.


Idol Night!


You guys – Simon Cowell may not be coming back to Idol after this season.  I’m telling you right now, that unless they replace him with someone equally fabulous, I will not watch it.  And you know American Idol is totally FREAKING OUT about the possibility of me, Mockarena, not watching the show.  

Anyway, I’ve kind of resigned myself to the fact that Adam The Freak Lambert is going to win this season.  There are too many freak-lovers out there for him not to win.  So I guess I’ll just have to be happy if my beloved Gokey comes in second.  Sigh.  He’ll still get a record deal, and I’ll still buy his CD, and I’ll still totally mock and snub my nose at Adam’s CD.  So all is well.

Now then.  On to the recap.

Continue reading ‘Idol Night!’

You Know What I Love?

I love when people like Susan Boyle show up on talent shows and completely surprise the crap out of everyone. And I love Simon Cowell’s reaction to them. Look at this frumpified woman blowing everyone away.

And I love this crazy stripping landbeast. LOVE.

And I actually love the other two judges too – not just Simon. That woman in the middle is positively gorgeous and she’s an emotional sap. I love that about her. And the other snooty British dude is fabulous.


Thanks to the alert and astute mockdocker for sending me the link to the contestant photos. LOVE!

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