Tag Archive for 'Nicky Hilton'

It’s Been Said Before…

…but holy mother of crap – Paris Hilton and her sister have the biggest feet ever:

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YAY!

I think Nicky Hilton has eaten a couple of sandwiches! 

Question.  WHY do women wear these kinds of bikini tops? These flatter NO ONE, no matter what your boobular area looks like.  If you have boobs, they just get mashed into oblivion, and if you don’t have boobs, this kind of top accentuates your lack of boobage.

I don’t get it.

Nice Try, Nicky Hilton

See how Nicky Hilton is blowing on sparkler candles?  It was her birthday, you see.  But they couldn’t very well have an actual CAKE, because that would imply that Nicky Hilton eats solid food, which she obviously does not. Look how she’s holding herself up by leaning on the person next to her.  It’s entirely possible that she’s not even really blowing out candles in this picture – she could just be exerting the effort that it takes for someone this thin to breathe.  She’s totally emaciated, and I’m pretty convinced that the thing she’s blowing on is just a colorfully decorated hatbox.

EAT, Nicky.  For the love of God, EAT.

P.S. I’m in DC on account of important business, but took the only 15 free minutes I have to mock someone for you.  See how much you all mean to me?

Holy Crap

Obviously taking eating advice from Nicky Hilton is Colin Farrell, pictured above looking totally emaciated.  I can only hope this is for a movie, and not how he intends to look for real.  Because even though he’s always looked like he needs a bath, he’s historically been quite handsome.

Oh Look! There’s Another One of Those “Unflattering Camera Angles” She Was Talking About

Give it up, Nicky Hilton.  You are so totally vomiting your meals.

Nice Try, Nicky

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Nicky is all flabbergasted that people are in freak mode over her weight.  Or her lack of weight, I should say.  She said:

“There’s no truth to any starvation, eating disorders, rumors.  I think the press has been printing a lot of pictures of me from unflattering angles.”

So considering this is a full-on front-facing angle, I’m officially going to call BS on her stupid excuse.  Isn’t the camera supposed to ADD ten pounds?  Look at her.  She can hardly lift a  BOUQUET OF FLOWERS, for crying out loud.

Alert: More Skinny Knees!

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Kate Bosworth must have thought Nicky Hilton’s knees were really attractive, because she’s stolen the look.  She also stole Rachel McAdams’ forehead.

Both of these were bad fashion choices, if you ask me.

My, What Shapely Knees You Have!

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Please find me a SINGLE PERSON who finds Nicky Hilton’s legs attractive.

Gross.

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Nicky Hilton, the oft-forgotten Hilton sister, was seen trying to chew the face off of her new boyfriend the other night.

I’m not even sure which of them I should make fun of for being a horrible kisser.  It’s probably both.

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