Tag Archive for 'lady gaga'

Question.

Is that a piercing?  Because eeew.

For a better look at what I’m referring to, jump in.

Continue reading ‘Question.’

Lady Gaga Used To Be Normal

I just thought you’d like to know.

Lady Gaga’s Fans Are Weird.

 

Sick and wrong.

I’m surprised she didn’t make a meat suit out of the cat.

Ridiculous.

I’m pretty sure this is Lady Gaga, because there are few other people stupid enough to wear whatever it is that she’s wearing in this photo.  And while I realize that mocking an outfit worn by Lady Gaga is tantamount to declaring that water is wet, I am especially offended by this get-up, and felt that it needed to be pointed out.

I know it’s wrong and evil, but I want her to sprain her ankle(s) in those stupid, ridiculous, stupid stupid footular contraptions.

Oh Thank God

Just when I was worried that Lady Gaga had run out of stupid crap to show up in at awards shows, she decides to arrive in an EGG. And not just an ordinary egg.  This one was equipped with an oxygen tank and fan.  Oh, and her Blackberry.  You know.

On the red carpet for the Grammys, Ryan Seacrest could only talk with Lady Gaga’s entourage, because, as they explained, she was in “incubation” until her performance.  They said, “She’s in an embryonic state and won’t be born until the performance.’  To which I would have replied, “Duh.”

She is ridiculous.  I hate that I like her music.

PS.  I’m back from DC, and you guys are going to be disappointed, but Daisy and I didn’t follow through on the dare.  We had intended to pose like the skanky girl I talked about a few days ago, but when we were around all of our nation’s historic monuments we felt like we just couldn’t be irreverent.  For the first time in our lives, perhaps, we behaved.

Sorry to disappoint. 🙂

Attention Townspeople: I Will Not Product Test This

According to this, Lady Gaga is going to release a fragrance which will smell like blood and semen.

Apparently, she’s out of ideas on ways to dress shockingly, so she’s moving on to shocking scents now.

She is ridiculous.  But not nearly as ridiculous as someone who would Actually Buy This Perfume.

ATTENTION TOWNSPEOPLE: I Have Great News!

A co-worker and I just engaged in a brief but fruitful discussion about Lady Gaga. We were contemplating what she could possibly wear that would be more shocking than raw meat.

I am pleased to report that we landed on two possibilities:

1. Live animals – remember her Kermit coat? Think live frogs instead. Like – super velcro’d onto her. Or maybe a coat of live possums. You know.

2. Someone else’s skin (a la Silence of the Lambs).

Then, and ONLY THEN, will she be able to raise her own stupid raw meat bar.

See how productive my office is? We solve problems, mockdockers. That is what we do.

This Totally Gave Me The Glees

So I’m in Vegas, you guys.  We have checked into the Wynn, and they allowed us to check in at 10am which is precisely 5 hours early, and they upgraded us inexplicably to their newly renovated room, and it’s fantastically beautiful and the curtains work by remote and the bathroom is bigger than my living room at home and we are overlooking the Strip and are planning to have unspeakable fun.

We’re going to go eat some unspeakably good food for lunch and then do some exploring, but I’ll be back later to mock stuff for you.  Promise.

Meantime, let’s not love Lady Gaga together. 🙂

This Is What Lady Gaga Wears To The Airport

You know what?  I’m really starting to loathe Lady Gaga.  Up to now, I’ve been annoyed by her, and annoyed with myself, frankly, for liking her songs.  But after the meat thing, I’ve moved past being annoyed into full-on loathing.

I like this write-up about her.  That is TOTALLY how I feel.  Like – when she wears whatever ridiculous thing she insists on wearing, I become physically tired from it.

At some point, she’s not going to be able to outdo herself.  I mean, what’s next?  Is she going to wear a dress made of human skin like in Silence of the Lambs?  How does she top slabs of meat?

Hate.

I Totally Forgot About The VMA’s, But This Is Pretty Much All You Need To Know

Cher, at 64, can still totally rock her Turn Back Time outfit.  I think this is assless, but I’m not certain.  Regardless, she looks amazing.  I know she’s been sliced into more than 100 Honeybaked Hams, but still.  Job well done, plastic surgeons.

And Lady Gaga wore a dress and shoes made from raw meat.  You know, because of how much she wants to SHOCK everyone.

Yawn.

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