Tag Archive for 'Heather Locklear'

Amanda Woodward Is BACK

First of all, I am not entirely sure I knew that Melrose Place was even still a show, but apparently it is, and apparently she’s back, and apparently that’s sort of a Big Deal. So I thought I should alert you of it.

Sorry this has been such a non-posty day, mockdockers. Daisy and I GAVE A SPEECH tonight, which if you’re so inclined you can read about on our other site. A speech. With an Actual Podium and everything. I know. Ridiculous. But I basically just got home, and am trying to catch up on a hundred billion things, and so that is my excuse. I’ll be better tomorrow. Promise.

Just How Big IS He?

This is the first question that popped into my mind when I just read that Nicolette Sheridan is now dating David Spade.  This picture adds to the intrigue.  First he dated Heather Locklear, then impregnated some Playboy centerfold, and now he’s with Nicolette, and by most standards, he’s one of the scrawniest, creepiest,  ickiest looking men ever.

I think we all know what’s going on here.

Heather Locklear Was Arrested

Heather Locklear was reportedly arrested for driving under the influence of prescription meds this weekend, but has since been released.

You know, mugshots are rarely flattering, and you can’t help but notice that Heather’s make-up is all smudged and stuff, but she looks DAMN GOOD for 47. 

I’m sure there’ll be some sort of announcement about her checking into rehab shortly.


Heather Locklear Is Classy

God, I love drunk celebrity pictures.  They’re like a gift.

Sexy Beast

While other sites post picture after picture of Heather Locklear in a bikini looking, frankly, TOTALLY hot, especially given she’s in her mid-40’s, I thought I’d show her looking heinous.  Because that’s what you count on me for.  And I aim to please.

Heather Locklear Might be Cuckoo. Or, She Might Not.


Paramedics were sent over to Heather’s place the other day, in response to a suicide call.  Except that when they got there, Heather was all, “Oh hi!  What are you guys doing here?”

So apparently her psychiatrist made the call to 911, citing concern about a phone call they’d had with Heather in which she sounded like she might be inclined to off herself.

Now we’re all left to wonder what the REAL story is.  Because really, aren’t you worried?  I’m planning on taking some Tylenol PM tonight just in case I’m having trouble sleeping due to all the concern I have over Heather’s well-being.  I suggest you do the same.

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