Tag Archive for 'Halle Berry'

A Hollywood Ball Took Place…

…and it was basically a smorgasbord of plastic surgery. Some good, some not so good. But before we get to the old women with tight faces, let me just show you the PERFECTION that was Halle Berry:

She’s with her new boyfriend, Oliver Martinez, who is SQUINTING because he is practically blinded by her perfection.  She is just indescribably, unspeakably beautiful.  It kiiind of makes me want to punch her in the face.

On the other hand, some of the women after the jump look like their faces have been abused enough.  Still – I wouldn’t mind punching them just for making themselves look so ridiculous.  Check out the good and the bad and the really really ugly!

Continue reading ‘A Hollywood Ball Took Place…’

Hey – You Know How I Just Got Done Telling You That I Had A Really Ugly Day?

Yeah.  This didn’t help.   And you know what made it even worse than Halle Berry looking like the perfection that she always is?  COURTNEY LOVE LOOKING AWESOME.

Courtney Love isn’t even having an ugly day with me, you guys.

Today sucks.

This Is What Happens When You Win An Oscar

I hope like hell this isn’t true, but it seems that there’s a bit of an curse on Oscar-winning females.  Kate Winslet announced this week that she’s splitting from her husband.  Halle Berry broke up with her sex-addicted dude after winning.  Reese Witherspoon split from whatshisface after winning.  Julia Roberts – same story.

I will be SO PISSED OFF at Jesse James if there is an ounce of truth to this, because I loved them together and because Sandra Bullock is so freaking likeable.

Then again, this is In Touch we’re talking about.  It’s not like a pillar of truthful news reporting or anything.

But still.  UGH.



Seriously – how vomit-inducing is Halle Berry?  She is unspeakably flawless and utterly unmockable.  Do you think she has ever had a zit ever?  EVER?!??!


So This Is What Halle Berry’s Kid Looks Like

Ladies and Gentlemen – I give you Nahla, the spawn of two absolutely gorgeous parents.  Personally, I kinda think she ought to be cuter, even though that makes me sound like a total beyotch. I’m serious though.  I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t this.

I Never Thought This Would Happen…

but behold:  A photo in which Halle Berry doesn’t look ridiculously perfectly absurdly gorgeous.

Halle Berry Has Her Baby Girl And Names It.

Halle Berry had her baby a couple days ago and named her Nahla Ariela Aubry.  Which is pretty, I guess, but it also has a disproportionate number of vowels in it. There is no reason to have that many a’s in a name.

I’m excited to see the first photos, because generally mixed kids are the most beautiful kids around, and couple that with the fact that Halle and her model-man are ridiculously beautiful anyway – this little girl will probably be like the most perfect specimen of a baby ever.

Halle Berry Has a Nice Pair

I’m just going to come right out and say it.  They’re exquisite.  They’re perfectly round, perfectly proportioned….they just beckon to be handled.  The way this particular dress highlights them is sublime.  Some people might suggest that they’re fake…but I think they’re the real deal.  Platinum all the way, baby.  No way those earrings are sterling silver.

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