You Can Sleep Now.


Ashley Judd’s New Movie TANKS Its First Weekend

You guys, it’s rated like FOUR PERCENT on, which is like EPICALLY BAD. And according to this, it’s completely tanked at the box office. Here’s the key excerpt from that article:

Yes, the lone new release is Freestyle’s The Identical, which is an allegedly laughably-bad faith-based bit of speculative historical fiction, fashioned around the idea that Elvis’s twin brother, who was a stillborn, actually survived and grew up in his famous brother’s shadow. The film stars Seth Green, Ashley Judd, Joe Pantoliano, and Ray Liotta and it earned just $534,000 yesterday. The picture will be lucky to crack $1.75m for the weekend in 1,956 theaters, and with even with just a $12m budget, that’s going to hurt City of Peace Films and Identical Production Company very badly.


This calls for another horrifically bad photo of her.

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Ashley Judd’s New Movie The Identical Is Getting Craptacular Reviews

She’ll say she never reads anything about herself, but y’all know that’s total BS, right? Anyway, just do a search on reviews for the new movie that’s sort of but not really about Elvis or maybe just an Elvis impersonator, and you’ll see that everyone sort of universally hates it.

And I’m telling you that because I needed an excuse to post this photo.


You Know What This Reminds Me Of?

The final result anytime I try to put together furniture that only has picture instructions and not written instructions.




These Exist. Picnic Pants.


Yeah. That’s Not A Ball.



Toddler Does Ice Bucket Challenge. Hilarity And Cursing Ensues.

I cannot stop laughing at this.

Ashley Judd Wants You To Believe She Hasn’t Watched This.

Seriously, you guys.  She tweeted this (only I changed the thumbnail to one that made me giggle more).

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What a load of crap.  “I don’t ever watch myself but I want everyone to watch this so I’m going to post it with a comment about how much I love my own dress except you can barely see any of the dress in this.”


And THIS, you guys.  WATCH HOW quintessentially obnoxious and better-than-you she is in this interview.


Ashley Judd’s Dog Got Bitten By A Snake, Because SHE KEEPS TAKING IT HIKING. HELLO.

If you look at Ashley Judd’s twitter or instagram, she’s constantly posting photos of her dogs on various mountain/forest treks she insists on taking them on, despite the fact that one of them (Buttermilk) is at LEAST 15 years old.

And now, it’s coming back to bite her, so to speak. BEHOLD:


It’s a process, she says.  Because she’s the dog whisperer, apparently.  15 year old Buttermilk is “committed to helping her,” she says.  Translation:  Buttermilk is a 15 year old dog who likes sleeping next to warm bodies, JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER FREAKING DOG.

So pretentious.  So ridiculous.  So quintessential Ashley.

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