TRUTH.

I love this.

It reminds me of how everything seems kinda bigger and more awesome when you’re a kid.  Case in point.  I remember being a kid and thinking going to Long John Silver’s to eat supper was like the BEST TREAT EVER, and I vividly remember how much I loved the crunchy fried batter, and hush puppies, and getting the paper pirate hat to wear as part of the kids’ meal.

Before Mr. Mock and I were married, but were living in sin about 13 years ago,  there was a day when inexplicably, we both had a huge craving for Long John Silver’s.  And it had been YEARS since either of us had eaten it, but it was one of those cravings that you could simply not deny, so Mr. Mock went to fetch LJS take-out, and we ate ourselves silly.

It was seriously only like 20 minutes later that we both felt a raging hatred for Long John Silver’s.  We could literally see beads of oil surfacing on our skin – that is how greasy and disgusting the food is.  And we REEKED.  We just felt completely gross, and vowed to never eat there ever ever again.

Fast forward to this weekend.  Grandma Mock informs us that she has coupons for Long John Silver’s, and since Mini Mock has a huge thing for pirates right now, and had never been there, she insists we should take him after going to the movies to see Frankenweenie this afternoon.  All of a sudden, I get nostalgic for Long John Silver’s, recalling how much I loved it as a kid, and thinking it’d cruel to deny Mini Mock that experience of wearing the paper pirate hat and tasting crunchy fried batter and hush puppies.  So I convince Mr. Mock we should go, and convince myself that it won’t be horrible the way it was 13 years ago.

To make a long story short, I was horribly woefully mistaken.  When we went in, the floor was sticky, and the place smelled like oily greasy ooze.  There is just no better way to describe the smell.  We ordered up a kid’s meal, and an order of hush puppies, because that was all we could get ourselves to even THINK about eating there.  Mini Mock didn’t like hush puppies, he didn’t like the crunchy fried batter, and he didn’t get a pirate hat.

We left after only about 20 minutes or so, but STILL smell the ooze on our clothes even 3 hours later.

NEVER EVER AGAIN will I let kid nostalgia rule over adult experience.

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  • Reminiscent_of_Purple

    TOTALLY AGREE with the Long John Silver’s descriptions, down to the cravings. I’ll get a sudden, strong urge/craving to eat there once or twice a year, and NOTHING will take away the craving except a trip to LJS.

    Then, after I’m done eating, I feel like a walking greaseball. Like my face is just going to slide off onto the floor, and then I would slip on it and fall on what used to be my face.

  • Rachel

    The husband and I last ate there nearly 5 years ago when we were up for a wedding at Purdue. We were sick all night. Haven’t been back since.

  • Wiz of ID

    That basically explains my first (and only) White Castle experience last week. Neither of us had ever had it, we were big fans of Harold & Kumar and were just dying to try it since it was 2 blocks from our hotel in Indy. We also had dinner plans in 5 hours, so we decided to share something small. Try it out, but not get full. We shared a simple slider meal. The meat was grey and see-through. The bread was soggy. The waffle fry things were charred. The meal came with 4 sliders. We each could barely down one. And felt sick for the rest of the night. Ick.

  • Hatchetwoman

    I felt that way the first time I had a Hostess Cupcake as an adult. Bleah. Bleah. Blean. And SO disappointed.

  • So Cal Mom

    Yup…got all excited one day, craving a Twinkie. Finally got around to buying some and wow! What a disappointment!!! It tasted nothing like what I remembered from when i was a kid! It was such a bummer!!! 🙁 I’ve convinced myself that sometime during the last few decades Hostess has changed the recipe and that’s why they don’t taste the same. Now McDonald’s french fries on the other hand…still awesome!!! 🙂

  • Hannah955

    That’s exactly how I feel about KFC. Once every couple of years I’ll crave fried chicken, and I’ll get takeout at KFC and by the time I’ve eaten one piece I want to throw up. I’m at the point now where I get queasy just thinking about KFC. Not to mention, there was an expose of the company that supplies their chickens, the employees were practising extreme cruelty against the live chickens, so for both those reasons I now boycott KFC.