Ode To The Great And Incomparable Buckeye Bob

So, I mentioned in the comments the other day that Buckeye Bob has been quite ill over the last several weeks – and in and out of the hospital.  It’s entirely up to him how much or how little he would like to share about his illness, and so I won’t presume to speak for him, but I got a message from him today and he wants all of you to know that he says “HI!”  Hopefully he’ll be around here yet this week so he can tell you “hi” himself.

I don’t know about you all, but the internet is just NOT THE SAME without Buckeye Bob.

I’ve been missing him like crazy, and decided to do a little jaunt down memory lane to rediscover BB’s introduction here at TMD.  And appropriately, hilariously, and rightly, his first comment EVER was back in June of 2008, on the topic of fat chicks. 

And so began BB’s quick-witted snappy comments here at the Mock Dock.  Shortly after that, BB and I developed a relationship over email, and in addition to sending me all sorts of fodder for the site, he also looked out for me.  He would alert me when someone was being creepy or rude, and he became this sort of on-line guard dog for me.  And then that guard doggedness extended to my sister, Bunny, my best friend Daisy, and later even my parents  (although I’m not even entirely sure he knows that they love him too!)  He’s always been that guy who we knew had our backs, no matter what.

And the photoshopping?  OMG – don’t even get me started.  In addition to the hilarious “modifications” he made to various pictures here at TMD, if you are lucky enough to be facebook friends with him, you also have access to GOBS of photos of beautiful female celebrities that have their arms around him.  His photoshopping is EPIC.

And of course, he started covering for me here when I’d be off gallivanting with Mr. Mock or friends on various trips.  And there was never even a QUESTION about who I’d want taking care of the Mock Dock in my absence. I mean, most days I’m fairly certain that people are here more for him than they are for me.  Because you guys know as well as I do – there is no one more hilarious and inappropriate and hilariously inappropriate as Buckeye Bob.  There just isn’t.

But what you may not know is that under that sarcastic, gruff, raunchy surface, BB is a PEACH.  He has a heart of gold.  And so it’s basically been breaking my heart that he’s been so sick.

Please send all of your available good health mojo, thoughts and prayers his way.  🙂

Obviously, only a really inappropriate photo goes with this post.  So here’s something to ruin childhoods.


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  • Reminiscent_of_Purple

    We love you, Bob! I’ve enjoyed bantering with you and reading your wittily inappropriate comments. I sent you a friend request on Facebook a few days ago and I have been praying for you since I learned you’ve been ill. Get well soon, my friend!!

  • MrsK

    From one Buckeye to another, get well soon, Bob! And remember, when the hot nurse gets mad when you grab her ass, just act like you’re stoned on pain meds.

  • SunnyAZ

    Love you BB! You make every day better and I continue praying that you get well soon.

  • Brenda of IL

    I’ve missed you around here, BB. Hope you are on the mend and back here right quick!

  • formerly jim

    Saving a prayer or three for your recovery and a seat at the MeetnGreet. Get better!

  • Victor

    Warmest wishes for a speedy recovery, BB!

  • Crabbyolebroad

    Get better soon BB! We miss you!

  • Robin

    Best wishes, BB. Sending you a few prayers, and some good healthy vibes.

  • Kathy

    I have been wondering where BB had gone for weeks now, both from this site and COTR. Speedy recovery! Hope you are on the mend soon.

  • ChrissyB

    Buckeye Bob’s comments are always entertaining. Prayers & good thoughts to him.

  • Rachel

    We miss you, BB!

  • Mamabear

    Oh no. Sending lots of prayers your way Buckeye. Get better soon! The sites really aren’t the same without you!

  • green eyed girl

    BB, praying for healing & can’t wait for your hilarious comments. We miss you!

  • Tish

    BB, am sending prayers up on your behalf. You are the sort of man this world needs more of! Get better soon.

  • Tina B

    BB, I hope you recover soon and are back on here with your humor and wit soon after that. I’ve missed you! Sending healing vibes your way, guy.

  • Hatchetwoman

    I missed that comment, somehow — I thought Bob might be on vacation.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you, Bob. And — get out of that hospital! There are sick people in there! 😉

  • DirectorEvil

    Here’s hoping for a speedy recovery so Buckeye Bob can rejoin the rank(s) here at the Mock Dock.

  • cindy r.

    Prayers are sent to BB to recover quickly-his comments have always been priceless! Thanks for all the laughs.

  • KiwiGirl

    Kia kaha Buckeye Bob! Be strong.

  • Ricci

    Mock you scared the crap out of me!!! I came from cotr to the comments from the other day, and then I saw this title, I feared the worst. Prayers for the incomparable, ever incorrigible Buckeye Bob.

  • Ricci

    Ok, scrolling down the thread, I found explanation, my bad, I should have read further, but I was just thinking about him the other day, and just figured I was missing him or something.

  • ER

    Get well soon BB. You are sorely missed around here.

  • rkwhyte2

    Get well BB I always got a good laugh out of your comments and look forward to you being back soon.

  • el pato

    Get your sorry butt out of that hospital!!!
    We need you back here!
    We love you and we miss you greatly, B-Bob!
    On another note, Mock, I think you need to
    do a Hai-ku for Bob.
    Perhaps that will get him feeling better too.

    love that bob!!

    (for those of you who remember that show!)

  • Ellie

    Get well and hurry back Buckeye Bob!!

  • tphilisw

    I was wondering where you’ve been. Prayers for you. Hope you get well soon.

  • janice

    BB – was hoping to see you at the meet n greet for Mock’s other site.

    I pray that you get well soon. And while I can’t haiku, here’s a stupid impromptu poem *clears throat*

    There once was this Bob from the Mock Dock
    With comments and photos that all rock
    He made us all laugh
    and that’s not even the half
    Please get better and I’ll buy you a Bock!

  • Gail

    Hope you get well soon, BB! Sending healing vibes your way!

  • King of all Photographers

    My best wishes to Mr. Buckeye, a man with an unrelenting cutting sense of humor.

  • HesterPrynne

    Get well soon, BB!

  • Angelaknits

    Get better, BB! We miss your snark 🙂

  • Nancy

    Prayers for recovery BB!

  • Buckeye Bob

    All of you are too nice. I just got home yesterday evening and it’s going to be awhile before I’m back to normal. I appreciate all the prayers and well wishes.
    Without going into too much detail, I have emphysema and get lung infections easily. The first hospital made several errors and I ended up going to another one 2 days after they released me. I was hemorrhaging and needed 6 pints of blood plus I still had pneumonia and heart trouble. So I have had blood transfusions, minor heart surgery, intubated three different times. Lost 25 pounds so it’s a great diet. They didn’t want me to come home. They wanted me to go to rehab but I said No, No, No.
    Hell, I’m tired typing this. I think ‘ll go take a nap. Thanks again everyone!

  • SunnyAZ

    BB, so happy to hear from you! It sounds like you have gone through hell. Prayers for a speedy recovery.

  • genetics73


    The best wishes and hopes from MockDock’s parents who – let us make it perfectly clear – have had no hand in running the show except by having created the girl. Speedy recovery to you, BB!

  • Bertl

    Feel better real soon Buckeye Bob! I really miss your commentary!

  • Tina B

    Aw, Buckeye Bob, I do hope you feel better soon, and avoid those cruddy hospitals. Their food isn’t that great, anyway, am I right? Hang in there, rest, and we all look forward to seeing you back here when you are up to it!

  • Mizz M

    BB!!! I wondered where you were…have missed your totally inappropriate sense of humor at COTR!!!! Heal fast, man! We miss you!