Sorry for the non-postiness yesterday, mockdockers.  Before I knew it, the afternoon was gone and we had company last night so there just wasn’t time to hang out with you guys here.

One of the folks we had over is a policewoman, who shall henceforth be known as CopGirl and she is a total badass.  She had some great stories, including one about a female detainee who removed and then hurled a tampon at her.  Yeah.

CopGirl is a tiny thing, probably no more than 110 pounds, but you just know when you meet her that she could beat the pulp out of you if she wanted to.  It’s all about the attitude.  And it’s not that she’s mean – she’s like the nicest, sweetest person ever.  She just has this total ass-kicking aura about her.

We talked some about what absolute BS it is that cops are ever allowed to be landbeasts.  I mean, it’s not safe.  They’re required to take a physical fitness test to BECOME cops, and the academy for training is tough physically as well.  But after that?  Many departments have basically no rules for maintaining fitness.

Let me ask you, would you feel safe if one of these cops were on the scene to protect you?

Those two probably can’t run to the refrigerator, let alone after a criminal.


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  • R

    My husband works for the DOD as a federal civilian police officer on a military base. Every six months, he’s re-tested on the same physical endurance requirements they had in the academy–running, lifting, dragging dummies, climbing, push-ups, sit-ups… If someone doesn’t pass, they’re put on unpaid leave and have a few days in which to successfully pass the fitness test or they’re fired.

  • Mockarena

    That. Is. Awesome.

    And it should be the rule everywhere! 🙂

  • sunnyAZ

    I agree, it sure should be the rule! Those two cops are huge and there are plenty more like them out there!

  • http://www.myspace.com/dorkymcspazatron Olivia J. Snarkypants

    I’d feel pretty safe, that first guy has a whistle. Whistles are very effective in stopping crime.

  • Lyonella

    o but if one of them sat on you to detain you it would be a slow sure death.

  • http://zackapalooza.wordpress.com/ Zachary

    What an odd shape that one on the right is.

  • Buckeye Bob

    I can picture someone running (walking) away from him all the while laughing. Waddle on over here and catch me fatass!
    You’ve heard of cops with icewater in their veins, this one has gravy in his.

  • R

    OJS, you crack me up! I laughed so hard that the water I was drinking nearly came out of my nose.

  • Tina

    I think these cops are WEARING their doughnuts—around their middles! I think that no doughnuts would be safe around these bad boys. Bad guys however would be very safe. NO running could be done by these Big Boys!

  • Hatchetwoman

    A few years ago, Los Angeles had a police chief named Willie Williams. I forget where he came from. His men had no respect at all for him. He was the first chief after Darryl Gates was basically forced out, and the cops had LOVED Gates. Chief Gates was older, but he kept himself in really good shape, and his uniform was always pristine. Willie? He didn’t even wear a uniform — there weren’t any big enough to fit him. Seriously; he wore a suit.

    He didn’t last.

  • Jen

    I think these guys have the same body type as the girl in the post above shakin’ it.

  • sunnyAZspawn

    sunnyaz is referring to my hubby!!!

  • Nancy

    If you watch the cops shows, a lot of the the police officers on that are heavy too and are really winded when chasing down the criminals….not heavy to the extent pictured above, but need to lose a few pounds.

    And R, I have observed what you say about the military police on the military installations where I have worked – they are in fantastic shape!