Sad Clown

I’m not a fan of clowns.  They’re completely creepy, even if they’re sad.  Or perhaps especially if they’re sad.

You know what else is creepy?  Dummies – like the kind ventriloquists use.  Did you guys every see the move Magic with Anthony Hopkins?  One of my best friends in 9th grade, and occasional mockdocker, introduced it to me and we watched it incessantly and called each other “schmucko” as a result (you have to see the movie to get that reference).  But basically since that movie, I’ve been creeped out by dummies.

If there were a horror movie about dummies and clowns it could very well be the scariest movie ever.

P.S.  What’s with this dude’s boots?

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  • Buckeye Bob

    Are you not familiar with Stephen King’s “It”?

  • Nancy

    I find nutcrackers creepy. Baring their teeth all the time….

    I think he is wearing boots as he is rooting for the Oklahoma Sooners?

    Damn, I recognize those inner thighs…..

  • Punky

    Soooo many things have gone horribly, horribly wrong in this picture! The boots, the moobs, the INSANE front wedgie this dude has going on, the lack of leg hair (thankfully), and the creepy makeup! I also hate clowns. “We all float down here.” shiver

  • R

    The only way I’ll be able to sleep tonight is by deciding this is what the clown wears UNDER his clown outfit.

  • barkleybug

    This commercial used to scare me to death when I was 10. Now it makes me laugh and think of you, Schmucko. My horrible geometry grades were totally worth it.

  • Tina

    He’s one of my favorite authors, Buckeye Bob.

    I’m wondering if perhaps this isn’t really a man, but is, in fact, a woman. I can’t imagine how or why a man that large would take the time to do that much manscaping. (no obvious hair on the legs, arms or face) When having a belly that large, bending over to reach below one’s knees is quite an accomplishment!

  • crabbyal

    Because I am from Texas, (Hook ’em Horns!!!) this is one of the best pictures of all time!!!!

  • Punky

    What was the clown’s name in “It?” I’ve been going nuts trying to remember it!

  • jenn

    @Punky – Pennywise, the clown.

  • J. Zeigler

    Don’t let that clown face disguise fool you.

    That’s Michael Moore!

  • Punky

    Oh. My. God. J.Zeigler, I’m in tears from laughing! Holy Hannah, he really does look like Michael Moore! How unfortunate for Mr. Sad Clown. Thanks Jenn – I would’ve been looking for my book to look up that name!

  • HurleyBurleyGirl

    AAAAhhhhhhhh! Clowns completely freak me out. I hate them!

    They are weird and not funny. I hated it when they would approach me at the circus when I was a little girl. I’m suprised I never “cotton candy assaulted” one of them.

  • CBinT-town

    Oh my God…I’ve been a Sooner fan my whole life and I find this deeply sad and disturbing…