Monthly Archive for July, 2009

So Precious.

I went and saw Baby Aufschneider this evening (Actual Name = Emily, for those who have been curious). She is so cute, and looks exactly like her dad, which I realize means nothing to most of you given that you don’t even know who her parents are. But if you did, you’d be like, “Aww! She looks just like her dad!’

So I get there, and I’m holding and loving on her, and Dame says, “Hey – are you good at clipping kids’ nails?” to which I replied, “Yes!” because I clip my kids’ nails all the time. So she hands me the clippers, and I totally botched the assignment, because I neglected to remember that teeny tiny brand new babies are really wiggly and squirmy and make jerky unexpected movements. And so poor Baby Dame got two teeny tiny fingertips nicked by me. I freaking INJURED A BRAND NEW HUMAN, you guys. She only let out a teeny tiny couple of meow-like cries, and promptly fell back asleep, but still. I feel TERRIBLE about this.

I should have just told Dame to bite Baby Dame’s nails off, because that is what you do when they’re itty bitty babies, but it’s been 3.5 years since Mini Mock was an itty bitty baby, so I forgot. Clearly I was overconfident.

Other than causing bodily harm to Dame’s infant, though, I had a great time. And I told Dame that you all said hello. :)

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Encore: I Still Want To Be Friends With These People

They were on the Today Show! LOVE LOVE LOVE.

LOVE.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Question.

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So, this is the forecast for Indy this weekend. Nice, right?  But can someone please explain to me the nuances between “mostly sunny” and “partly cloudy” and “mostly cloudy” and “partly sunny?”

I’m looking at the Saturday forecast that says mostly sunny, which to me implies that there will be very few clouds.  And yet, there is more cloud cover in that picture than in the one for Sunday’s forecast, which says “partly cloudy.”  Wouldn’t you think that “mostly sunny” would have LESS cloud cover in the picture than “partly cloudy?” 

You can imagine, then, my total bewilderment about how much sun to expect tomorrow.   I mean, if I’m to believe the picture, then there’s going to be a lot of clouds.  And yet the description reads, “mostly sunny.”  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHICH IS IT?

If I were in charge of weather descriptions and weather pictures, I would establish a rule that you could never again use the word “partly” to describe the weather.  Only “mostly.”  That way, if it’s going to be “mostly sunny” people know that for the most part, they can expect a good deal of sun, but they might see a cloud or too.  And if it’s going to be “mostly cloudy” then they’ll know that the sun may only peek out once or twice during the day.  These “partly’s” are totally throwing me for a loop, and the pictures only exacerbate the problem.

Then again, it’s Indiana, so it’s not entirely out of the realm of possibility that it could snow tomorrow.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Because Of COURSE We Needed This

In today’s “Products We Never Knew We Always Needed” News – I give you the Dog Snuggie.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

IT’S FRIDAY!!!

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You totally know that’s what this little monkey is saying.  He’s either happily saying that it’s Friday, or he’s singing a Robbie Williams song. 

After work today I’m going to go visit Dame Aufschneider’s brand new baby girl!  I mean, I’m going to visit Dame too, and Mr. Dame, but mostly this is all about the brand new Baby Dame.   I am going to grab that baby and INHALE her head.  Perhaps I’ll return her, and perhaps not.  By the way, if you had fanified The Mock Dock on facebook (see bottom right corner of the main page here), then you’d have already known that baby Dame had arrived.  Facebook fans get the early scoop, you see.  So if you haven’t already proceeded with your fanification, you really should.

For those of you who have been around long enough to remember Dame and Holmes, you should know that Dame’s not the only one with fabulous life changing stuff going on.   Holmes is getting married next month, you guys.  How great is that?  And the even greater part is that he’s marrying one of my dearest long-time friends.  And the even greater part is that I get to do the official wedding toast.  I’m so excited I can hardly stand it!

So it’s a good summer.  And more goodness is coming.  Stay tuned.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Wow.

So, I saw this picture today, of a landbeast, and what’s unusual about it is that I’m not entirely certain whether or not it’s revealing a part of her anatomy that’s considered NSFW.  Whether it’s not safe for LIFE, there is no doubt.  So, in any case,  I’m putting it after the jump, just in case it’s inappropriate nakedness, versus just really gross nakedness.

Continue reading ‘Wow.’

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Lumpiest. Superhero-Type-Person. EVER.

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Located:  The best friend of the purple-shield guy.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Understatement Of The Century

“His brother says he has mental problems.” Um…ya think?

Seriously. If there is an Actual Medication that has been created to cure someone of their desire to molest horses, then our society is a lot sicker than I’d originally thought.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

Life With Cats

Bunny sent me a link to these hilarious cat videos this morning. This one is my favorite. If you have ever had a cat, you will recognize at least tiny pieces of your cat in this cat. This cat is TOTALLY my cat, only maybe half as destructive.

LOVE.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!

GOOD MORNING!

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This is the kind of stuff that winds up in my email from alert and astute mockdockers.  GOD I love that.  I’m just not sure I love it this EARLY (it’s 6am). 

Anyway, how unfortunate looking is this person?  I THINK it’s a male, but I’m not 100% certain.  You know who this reminds me of?  Juliette Lewis.  I’ve always thought Juliette Lewis was a rather unfortunate looking person too.  It doesn’t help when she wears outfits like this (in fact I wouldn’t be the least surprised if this person stole the duct tape out of her closet).

I’m so curious about the giant purple shield-thing.  What if there’s some sort of message on it that we can’t see at our angle?  And the reason he/she is so happy is because the message is like the secret to the meaning of life or something, and we’re just all sitting here, completely oblivious to it, while he/she on the other hand, is happily carrying around the meaning of life on a giant purple shield wearing duct tape as a bra, knowing full well that he/she has the upper hand?

It’s possible.

It’s also possible that I shouldn’t write posts before I’ve been caffeinated.

P.S. Don't forget! County/State Fair photo contest going on RIGHT NOW! See here for details: FAIR CONTEST!
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