Sharing Time! (WARNING: Serious, Unmocky Information Below)

So, some of you longtime mockdockers may have noticed a few instances where I’ve casually mentioned Junior Mock.  Junior Mock is my 12 year old son.  I don’t mention him often, because he’s not your average 12 year old boy who does average 12 year old things that average moms talk about.  Mini-Mock?  Totally a regular 3 year old.  But Junior Mock is special.

I’m telling you about him now, because on Wednesday, he’s going to be going through a significant and major surgery, and so you should probably be prepared for the fact that I’m likely to not be my normally clever and mocky self for at least a few days after that.  On the other hand, I might NEED The Mock Dock as a diversion from what’s probably going to be a pretty excruciating couple of weeks.  So who knows – I might be telling you all this for no reason at all!

Anyway, I think I’ve mentioned that both my boys were born prematurely.  This is because, as I’ve told you, I’m a horrible oven.  I developed pre-eclampsia with both, and HELLP sydrome with Junior Mock.  Junior Mock, although he was born at 30 weeks compared to Mini-Mock’s 28 weeks, suffered a great deal as a result of complications associated with his birth, which were mostly the result of gross incompetence by the hospital.  To make a really long story short, he was without oxygen for several minutes, and experienced serious brain damage as a result.

I was prepared by doctors and specialists early on to expect that he’d be profoundly disabled, and indeed he is.  Junior Mock will never walk or talk, he is confined to a wheelchair, and is fed via g-tube.  He’s on medications to help control seizures and loosen up his always-stiff muscles.  He is totally incontinent and will always be in diapers.  He has had dislocated hips since he was less than 3 years old.  He gets botox injections (not the cosmetic kind!) into his hamstrings to allow him to maintain some range of motion. And,  over the past year or so, he’s developed a curve in his spine which has progressed so quickly that his left lowest rib is now rubbing against his pelvic bone. 

So, on Wednesday morning, he will be getting a spinal fusion.  It’s the only way to relieve the discomfort he’s currently experiencing and prevent his organs from becoming squashed by his ribcage.  They’re going to slice him open from the base of his neck down to his tailbone, and insert two long rods along his spinal column.  They’ll graft some bone from his pelvis to help those rods begin to fuse along his spine, and straighten him out.  He’s expected to stay in the hospital for probably around 10 days, and then will face a long recovery at home.

SO, I’m gearing up for Wednesday, by trying to have as much fun as possible until then. 🙂  Chicago was huge.  Tomorrow will be an early celebration of mother’s day at my house and the whole family will be here.  Daisy and I have a fun lunch planned for Tuesday.  But Wednesday will come, and I’ll be at Junior Mock’s bedside, hoping for as smooth of a recovery as he can possibly have.

So I guess what I’m asking, my mockdock friends, is that you have patience with me if posting is limited beginning on Wednesday, OR if I post incessantly about his recovery.  I am not sure yet if I’ll need “mock therapy” to take my mind off of it all, or if I’ll need to use this site as a way to just put cyber pen to paper about everything that’s going on with him.  Or perhaps both.  The good news is that Junior Mock is an incredibly joyful and happy boy, despite all of his obstacles and the dependence he has on others to do something as simple as shift his position.  I can practically guarantee that he’ll give me a smile within 24 hours post-op.

And hopefully, after a month or so,  everything will be back to normal and he’ll be straight and comfortable  and we’ll just pretend none of this ever happened.  Meantime, thanks in advance for being my sounding board!

Related Posts with Thumbnails
  • Jenn

    God bless! I hope we can provide you with some humor and support too as you go through this all.

  • Rachel

    Wow. That is my word for you. I cannot imagine going through that or being a mother like you are. I think I would’ve given up long before. Congrats to you and Junior Mock for being such delightful spirits, and I’m sure this surgery will not be able to get you down. Your whole family will be in my prayers.

  • Captain Ana Banana

    Good luck to you both! You’re so cool to be as humorous and high-spirited as you are. When my little brother was diagnosed with nephrotic syndrome, it was so difficult to try and be happy around him cuz I was always so afraid for him. People like you help me work on being stronger.

  • el pato

    prayers all around, mocky.
    stay strong for junior mock and lil mock.
    you are an awesome woman.

  • QuiteContrary

    This post was amazingly touching. Baby-daddy and I were sitting here (because both of us read the MockDock) tearing up while reading this post.
    As a teenager (some during high school and through college), I worked as a caregiver for elderly people. Many of whom we bed ridden with Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s or post-stroke complications. I was often very close with these people and provided 24/7 care, in some situations… dealing with g-tubes, incontinence, botox injections and a host of other issues.
    I know my experience working in that field is in no way comparative to your own experience… However, I understand how overwhelming it is to see someone you love, hurt (because you do grow to love the people you care for). I also understand how overwhelming it can be to want to provide the best care possible and still maintain yourself.
    Neither of these thoughts are entirely based on my own direct experience, so much as having watched children and spouses try to be strong… even when it’s the hardest.
    I wish your family the best. And I pray for a speedy/uncomplicated recovery.
    God never gives you more than you can handle… or something he doesn’t think you’ll be better for having experienced it.

  • Directorevil

    What can us mockdockers do to help from afar?
    I know the mockers above have offered their prayers,
    but both myself and MrsEvil are non-believers, but wish
    you and your family the best.
    If you want some financial help or just a contribution to a
    medical cause, please let us know…I think you know our email.
    Best wishes and tons of + karma.
    The Director and Mrs. E

  • Mockarena

    How sweet are all of you? OMG. So sweet. 🙂

    Thanks for all of your support. Even though I don’t know you guys in real life, I love the community we’ve created together here. And it’s nice to know you’re all out there sending good wishes our way!

    Many many many many thanks. 🙂

  • Susie Switzer

    Godspeed Junior Mock in your recovery. Hang strong Mockarena, your fans unite and send you strength, support and prayers.

  • QTKT526

    mock, that really was a very touching post! i was a student teacher in a classroom for kids with profound disabilities one semester and it was the most rewarding placement i ever had – i will definitely be thinking of you and junior mock this week!

  • Hatchetwoman

    Mock, I don’t know what to say. I would never in a million years have guessed that you have this cross to bear in your life. I am simultaneously awed and humbled. So many people would have become negative and self-pitying; instead, you manage to have a full life and give your child as full a life as he can have. It’s no mystery where Junior Mock gets his strength and joy for life.

    I will keep Junior Mock in my prayers, and I’ll also pray for you, your husband, and Mini-Mock. May God bless all of you.

  • Buckeye Bob

    Good luck through it all and I hope he has a speedy recovery and is back home soon. We’ll all be thinking about you.

  • Dani

    Good luck. Your entire family will be in my thoughts. My sister does home health care with pediatric patients, and one of her clients sounds just like your son. I can only imagine how difficult it must be at times, but I commend you for your positive outlook and great sense of humor. Best wishes to Junior Mock for a speedy recovery!

  • lizzieinatizz

    hey you …. take all the time you need. Sending SOS prayers out for you & Mr Mock, Mini and esp. Junior through this critical challenge. He’s very blessed to have a brave & beautiful mummy like you.

  • Sarah

    Wow. Reading this shocked me to say the least. My little brother Aaron who passed away when I was 10, and he was 4 (the day before his 5th birthday) had almost the exact same situation. He was born prematurely with his brain and liver bleeding and they didn’t expect him to live at all. He shocked them all and turned into an amazing little boy. He also had the problems with his hips, and had to have surgery. He was also fed through the g-tube and would have always had the mentality of a 6 month old. I commend you for being a great mother to (both) of your sons. It is an incredibly difficult situation, but one that a good mother wouldn’t think twice about undertaking. (Many people asked my mother why she didn’t have my brother live in a special home). I will have you all in my prayers. He will be so happy to see your face when he wakes up after surgery, and I am sure he will give you that smile.

  • Diana

    Mock, I’m sending you all the best wishes and good vibes I can. I hope it goes well, and Junior Mock is feeling much better very soon.

  • anonandon

    Positive vibes heading your way! Thinking about you and yours. I appreciate the diversion in my day this forum provides and can only hope, in a small way, that it does the same for you when you’ll need it most!

  • Punky

    Mock, I’m sending all of my positive energy and prayers. My son went through open heart surgery in October, so I know how stressful surgery on your precious child can be. What a lucky boy Junior Mock is to have such a strong, courageous woman as his mother! Like everyone else, I just know you’ll get that smile! I’ll bet Junior Mock inherited his happy-go-lucky gene from you.

  • Pris

    My heart and thoughts are with you both. If I were Junior Mock I wouldn’t want any other mom other than you. *tight hug* Good luck

  • DM

    Mock, as I wipe away the tears after reading your post I can only say you are one heck of a mother.

    Good luck to you and your family.

  • Nancy

    You and the entire family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  • Lali

    Hang on there, Mockarena, your son couldn’t have a better mom. Love

  • shortblur

    Take all the time you need, Mockarena. We can wait for things to get back to normal. My thoughts are with you and Junior Mock for a smooth operation and speedy recovery.

  • Cate


  • Wendy

    I’m sorry, Mock. I hope all goes well.

  • Groovy Girl

    I pop in and read your blog from time to time and I find it hysterical and thought provoking to say the least. (My favorite are the Sax 5th Ave Jeans pics)I keep coming back for more! Today you opened up to the group and shared something very personal and monumental. It gives us a reality check about how precious life is. I hope Junior Mock receives the best care known to man and peace for you and your family, PS – also for continued progress for Mini Mock. Can’t forget that little guy..

  • KateyLan

    I don’t post much, I usually just lurk around here, but I am on the mock dock every day. I had to post today to let you know I will have Junior Mock and your whole family in my prayers now and in the weeks to come.

  • Mockarena

    Thanks so much, everyone. I’ll be re-reading all of your comments on Wednesday, I’m sure!


  • Oliva J. Snarkypants

    You know what I hate? When you’re pregnant or other people are pregnant and someone says,”Oh I don’t care if I have a boy or girl, just as long as they’re healthy.” As if it would be unacceptable to give birth to an unhealthy child and they would love that baby less. My son was born with Down Syndrome and has had several health complications. And yet I never knew my heart could hold so much love. It only gets stronger everyday.

    People say all the time, “I don’t think I could do what you do. You’re so strong.” Well when you’re handed something difficult, anything difficult, you just handle it. Parents with sick kids are no different. We know no different and we just roll with the punches.

    My deepest sympathies. My thoughts are with your family.

  • densul555

    My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your son.

  • cynthia

    Wow, what can I say? I came to your site by ‘accident’ a month after my mother passed and you made me smile again. I wrote then to thank you- never knowing what you and your own family were going through. My heart just goes out to you and your little boy-I have 2 boys of my own. Know that this unseen friend will be praying for a wonderful outcome on Wednesday and the days to come. Bless you and your family.

  • R

    I’m going to be praying for Junior, for you and your husband, Mini, the grandparents, and for every medical peson who will have their hands on your child.

    Do you know that tears of grief and sorrow have a different chemical make-up than tears of joy and laughter? Tears of sorrow and grief are healing physically as well as emotionally. And it’s hard to be so darn strong all the time. It’s always harder on those who love the person in pain than it is for the person in pain.

    So don’t force yourself to be strong when you’re feeling helpless. You’ve got a great husband and parents for support when you’ve reached your limit. So go ahead and cry when you need to. It’s a release and it’s healthy. Then you can muster your strength and courage and lean on each other and together love your son and each other through this painful but necessary surgery and recovery.

  • Kitty’s Mom 325

    I’ve never posted before, but I come to your site everyday and even added this site as a link for all others to come to on my facebook page. I just wanted to send you my thoughts and prayers for you and your family. Thank you for all you do for us out here in cyberland and know that we all send you and your son our best wishes.

  • PurpleAnn

    Mock, I’m so sorry to hear that your family is facing this difficult time. My heart goes out to you. Please know that we all wish your son the speediest of recoveries. When I was going through a difficult time in my own life, I came across this poem & it made me feel better:
    Courage doesn’t always roar.
    Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.”
    (almost as good as one of your haikus!)This post should have the most comments ever!

  • Leeloo

    I hope everything goes well for your son! What an awesome mother you are. My best wishes that he recovers speedily!

  • Mockarena

    Olivia J Snarkypants and those of you who also have first hand experience dealing with kids who have special needs, I’m going to assume you’ve heard about the difference between Italy and Holland? 🙂

    If not, you MUST read this. It’s a poem that literally saved me from totally losing my mind when I first heard what would become of Junior Mock.

    By Emily Perl Kingsley:

    I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability – to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this……

    When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting.

    After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland.”

    “Holland?!?” you say. “What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.”

    But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay.

    The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.

    So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

    It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…. and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills….and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

    But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy… and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.”

    And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away… because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

    But… if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things … about Holland.

    Love. 🙂

  • bja

    Positive thoughts and wishes for a speedy recovery going out to Junior Mock and the whole Mock family!

  • sunnyAZ

    Along with everyone else, I send to you all my good wishes and prayers. God bless you and your family.

  • Birdie

    As the mom of two with a learning disability, I can not understand (totally) what you are going through, but…. I wish you all the luck and love in the world for you and your family.

    HUGS & Kisses!!!!!


  • Punky

    Mock, I just LOVED that poem! I would never pretend to know what you are going through, but as a mom facing more surgery with her son, I can sympathize. Lean on your family and friends, and all your friends here! We love you! Many blessings and hugs.

  • Sarah

    Olivia– You should give yourself more credit. It is very modest of you to say that you are no different, and you just roll with the punches. Honestly though, what you do is commendable. Not everyone could handle it. A lot of parents would send their children to be taken care of by someone else (so many people asked my mom WHY she didn’t send him somewhere else. She never thought twice about it)

    Anyways, I admire you, Mock, and every other parents that does the amazing things you do.

  • Anonymous

    god bless u & ur family..

  • Melissa

    Wow! Best of luck to Jr Mock and your whole family as he recovers. I’ll be thinking of you!

  • jessy

    you are truly an admirable person taking care of the 2 awesome kids you made. dont give up your strength and your passion. best of everything to you as you go through these next few weeks.

  • pict13

    Stay strong, take all the time you need, we’ll be here if you need us.

  • Tatertot

    Thanks for sharing the strength behind the humor.


  • Nancy

    I would also like to add that it is so AWESOME that you and Mr Mock have parents who will take your children so you can have a date night once in a while….with a child with challenges….now I know where all of your awesomeness comes from! Wow.

  • Wiggity

    I can’t even imagine what you and your family must be going through. You will all be in my thoughts and prayers. You have Mega-Love from your MockDock family.

  • Ana

    All my prayers go out to you and your family, Mock. And thank you for the poem, it’s something I will never forget.


  • Jordon

    I always knew you were tough as nails. God bless you mam, I have a mentally disabled brother, I have some idea of the attention that’s required. Will be praying for your family.

  • Oliva J. Snarkypants

    I was given the Holland essay when Little Snarkypants was in the NICU after he was born. It was exactly what his father and I needed to hear and after that, we just hit the ground running. Thanks for posting it so I could read it again.

  • kittythepooka

    Oh Mockarena. My love and support goes out to you. Even under all this stress and worry you still manage to put on a bright face and make us smile. It is unbelievably inspirational. I am positive that this is true in your everyday life, and that everyone who knows you and your kids find your presence to be a treasure. I’m praying that the surgery will go fine, along with everyone else here.

  • CW

    I will pray for your son and your family for his recovery and strength…

  • el pato

    mocky, i think you can tell from your mockdock family, just how
    much we all care for you and your family.
    we all love you and have a great deal of respect and admiration for
    all you do. not just for us, but for all you do for everyone!!
    you are an amazing woman, you have an amazing family, and
    we all love you. all will go well Wednesday, with all the prayers here, the good karma, the support from everyone.
    we love you.

  • cyazdani

    Will be thinking of you this week. The Holland essay was awesome. I will definitely keep it for future use. Thanks for sharing.

  • jen

    My thoughts are with you. I wish I couls say everything that just flashed through my head as I read that… and then I found that most poeple here said it already. If you need anything, you should let us (even if we only “know” you through this site) know. I have no doubt that this little community of strangers is pulling for you.

  • G-Dizzle

    Mock-you, Mr. Mock, Mini-mock and especially Junior Mock will be in my thoughts & prayers. Mr. Dizzle had harrington rods put in (neck to butt!) for scoliosis when he was 15. It sounds very similar to the procedure Junior Mock is having-though for different reasons. Mr. Dizzle and his Momma-Dizzle said that is when he developed his obession with having his back tickled. Momma Dizzle did it every day and night after his surgery to relax him and the pain. Now it is passed on to me. A simple light scratching of his back, following that straight, long line of his scar and it soothes him when he is stressed out.
    Make sure Junior Mock gets lots of Momma Mock back scratches & tickles!

  • foxy

    I’ll absolutely say a prayer for all of you. I hope the surgery goes as planned and he gets all straightened out.

  • elizabeth.

    I’m late to the party… but it just gave me a chance to read everyone’s heart-felt comments!

    Mock, this is touching. Thank you for sharing with us, you have no obligation to delve into something so personal, but you have and you you’ve managed to touch each one of us. It’s kind of crazy how a blog has created a little community. You and your family are in my prayers. Have faith that everything will be okay and remember that God only gives you what you can handle.

    You’re an awesome Mom! <3

  • Little Eye

    It seems like everything that could have been said has been said. Yet, I too want to express my awe at yours and Junior Mock’s courage and strength, Mini-Mock’s ability to roll with the punches and be a great big brother, and Mr. Mock’s ability to be there with you all and give you all the support you need (as well as provide a great sounding board when you need it!).

    There will be a lot of people’s thoughts and prayers surrounding you all on Wednesday, and I’m so glad you have this venue in which to let people know. Please keep us posted. In some small way, I feel like you (and the rest of the Mock Dock crew) are a part of my extended family; more than that, because I don’t hear from most of my extended family for years and years! So here’s having Sissy, Auntie, or Momma Little Eye keeping her little eye on you, and her hands folded for you too!

  • Kim

    Best wishes & many prayers for you and your family! You’re a wonderful mother, and you’re right…we never have, and probably never will meet, but the community you’ve created here is amazing. Keep it up…you have a true talent. Thanks for letting us all live spontaneously through your life stories…and comic writings!

  • meganyore

    mock, i cant say anything thats not been said by everyone here :o) we will all be thinking of you and sending our thoughts, prayers and love. thanks for posting this and letting us in a little bit more into your world! ;O)
    i think its pretty amazing the support and love you have from all your readers! thats the most touching of all.
    prayers for a speedy recovery and I hope you do get that smile from your little angel. :o)

  • sondra

    Words are simply not enough to express how my heart goes out to you and your family. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you and especially Junior Mock as he goes through this surgery.

  • Kami

    My thoughts and prayers are with your family. I hope for a speedy recovery for Junior Mock and I hope it makes him feel better once he heals after the corrective surgery.

    The poem was sooo beautiful.

  • april f.

    My thoughts, prayers, and well wishes are with you and your family, but especially Jr.
    Just know that your mockdock family is thinking of you and will be here for whatever you need!

  • Mrs. Kirby

    When my husband was only 8 years old, he went through the same spinal fusion surgery. He needed it because he was hit by a car, and paralyzed from the chest down. His mother was ill and couldn’t be with him.

    We’ve been married almost 6 years, and I know God placed me here as his wife, just as He placed you as Junior Mock’s mother. I know the daily struggles you go through–I’m doing it, too.

    He’s lucky to have you as his Mom. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  • green eyed girl

    Mock and family… You can bet I’ll be praying for Junior Mock, the doctors performing the surgery and strength for your family as they endure this trial.

    As of my post, there were 65 comments. That really touches my heart! Consider yourself loved by an extended family.

  • ER

    Mock….my friend’s grandson (16 yrs. old) had this same surgery last summer and he’s doing amazingly well. Prayers are with you and your family as you prepare for this upcoming procedure!

  • Mrs. F

    Praying for your strength and the well being of Jr. Mock! *hugs*

  • Mommamia

    Mock…have not been able to be on the site for a few, just saw this and am thinking about you and your family today and sending good vibes and prayers to you.