You know why I’m a Gokehead, besides the fact that Danny’s voice completely blows me away? I love that he is the anti-media person. Like – his wife freaking DIED a few months ago, and this past weekend he had to attend his grandpa’s funeral, and he just never uses the crappy stuff that happens to him as a way to gain the affection of voters. He just sings. I love that.
And by that I of course mean that these pants are the WORST. These are mink pants. Pants made of mink.
This is apparently some dude who knows someone on The Real Housewives Of Atlanta, which is apparently a show that people apparently watch. I do not. And one of the reasons I don’t is that people on that show wear MINK PANTS.
An alert and astute mockdocker sent me a link to a product called the Peekaru. It’s pictured below.
When I saw this picture, I was like, “Aww – that’s cute. That’s like a Baby Bjorn, only warmer and cozier and more fashionable.” And then I thought, “I wonder why the alert and astute mockdocker sent this to me – seeing as how it’s a totally regular not-at-all-out-of-the-ordinary unmockable product.”
An alert and astute mockdocker sent me this video, and Mr. Mock insists it’s computer generated, but I don’t know enough about computer generated stuff to know how that’s possible. All I know is that this dude is not human.
Remember a long time ago when I posted about the overzealous Panda Express Lady? Well, she has not been at the Panda Express in several months. I don’t know what happened to her, because seriously – why would I? But Dame and I went to Panda today, and I realized that I actually miss her. The Panda people there now aren’t nearly as excited to see me. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that they’re NOT excited to see me.
You know what I hate? I hate that the way our Panda is set up, you order your food at one end of an assembly line type of counter, and you get your food pretty much right at that same end that you order, but then what happens is that you have to wait forEVER for all the people ahead of you to make it down the line to the cash register. And then by the time you pay, your food is not all that hot and steamy anymore.
Mr. Mock will attest that I am totally quirky about eating hot food. It’s one of the reasons that I’m such a fast eater (which I know is bad for you). It’s because I enjoy food most when it’s, as Mr. Mock would say, “Chernobyl Hot.” There are actually some foods that, when they cool even only slightly, I actually can no longer eat them. Mac and Cheese is the perfect example. If I don’t see steam rising from my Mac and Cheese, I will not eat it. It has to be PIPING.
Just a little Mockarena factoid I thought you might be interested in.
By the way, the cashier at Panda today? His name was Bambang. I am totally not making this up.
An alert and astute mockdocker sent me two new “products” which she thought might be of interest. The first, pictured above, is the C-string. It probably doesn’t need a whole lot of explanation. I’m not above admitting to you that I can see the appeal and functionality of this particular product. BUT, I won’t product test it publicly, because I cannot begin to imagine how utterly embarassing it would be to actually TELL you all how it worked for me personally. I’ll tell you right now though, that if it came with a guarantee that my body would look like hers, I would pay TOP DOLLAR for this. I’ll keep my own face though.
Second product? Even skankier than the first. BEHOLD: the bikini pant.
This is just stupid. But if any of you mockdockers are interested in product testing it, be my guest. Just make sure you send us the pictures.
An alert and astute mockdocker sent this to me and if this doesn’t make you want to just run out and find the nearest baby piglet to cuddle with, I don’t know if we can be friends.
You know what government should be spending money on instead of the auto industry? Figuring out a scientific way to prevent piglets from growing up. THAT is something I would feel good about spending my tax dollars on.