Guess What? The Mock Dock Has Had Another Brush With Fame!

Judd, Ashley

Hey – do you guys remember that movie Someone Like You, with Hugh Jackman and Ashley Judd?  I will always remember it as being a demonstration of how horrific of a kisser Ashley is, because she’s a smash mouth kisser.  If you watch her kissing scenes with both Greg Kinnear and Hugh Jackman (particularly at the very end of the movie) you’ll notice her smashmouth technique.  It’s horrific.  Plus, you may or may not have noticed that in nearly EVERY SCENE of that movie, Ashley is eating something.  I remember seeing an interview with Ashley during the film’s promotion, and the interviewer made some comment about her eating in every scene, and she obviously wasn’t aware that she was eating in every scene, and was totally put off by the comment.  It was priceless.  If I could only find it, I would share.  But for now, you’ll have to trust me that she was irritated, and it was FLAT AWESOME.

ANYWAY, guess what?  The author of the book on which that movie was based, Laura Zigman, has a blog.  On it, she writes in 3rd person about various goings-on in her life, and not terribly long ago she wrote about going to the movie premiere of Someone Like You back in 2001.  And not surprisingly, she had a less-than-positive experience with our good friend Ashley.  She called Ashley “The Faux French Intellectual” which I LOVED, and so I made a comment on her blog, encouraging her to visit The Mock Dock to see the I Hate Ashley Judd category.

So today – look what I found!  Laura Zigman, famous author of four novels, has given a shout-out to The Mock Dock!  Scroll down to #10 on that linked page.   How cool is that?

So to Laura Zigman, if you return here to see this post, know that I share your disdain for The Faux French Intellectual, as do many of the mockdockers who frequent this site.  You are officially a Super Awesome Friend Of The Mock Dock, and I hope that you visit often. 

Give Laura some love in the comments, mockdockers!

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  • Laura

    LOVE your site. LOVE your tone. LOVE your content. I will track-back or link-back or ping-back or do whatever it’s called to put this post onto my brant. Let’s stay in touch!

  • rosie too

    I don’t need to read Laura’s blog to give her some love (although I will). Animal Husbandry is an excellent book and that movie ruined a great story. If I were her I’d be pissed. Hell, I was pissed and I only read the book. Thumbs up to Dating Big Bird, too. And now you’re on The Mock Dock. Laura Zigman, officially, LOVE.

  • Laura

    Love you, too, Rosie. Now I’m never leaving. I’m just going to sit here all day and bask in the kind words about me and the mocking words about others…

  • Buckeye Bob

    See how you’re getting bigger. Next thing you’ll be on Chelsea Lately (Like Perez Hilton)

    I checked Laura’s site out and tried to leave a comment but it would not accept it. Evidently I needed to register or have a Google account. Anyway I just gave up, not going to “set up an account” just to say hi or leave a comment.

  • Buckeye Bob

    P.S Laura, No offence on your site, I just couldn’t leave a comment so I’ll just say hi here.

  • Laura

    Sorry about that, Bob. Thanks for trying. (And I hope you, Mock Dock people, don’t mind me co-opting the comments-section here for my own purposes…I’ll stop soon).

  • Mockarena

    DON’T STOP, LAURA!!! You must now comment on every single post. Seriously – I’m sitting here totally giggling and blushing like a 2nd grader who just got her braids pulled by the boy behind her in the recess line. I’m TICKLED that you’re here and that you’ve been so complimentary. I could just cry with pride. 🙂

    Now. Please get me a book deal.

    KIDDING!!! So glad you’re here!


  • Rachel

    I don’t hate Ashley Judd, but I’m not a super-fan either. However, I do love “Someone Like You.” It’s one of those movies that make you scream at the television. How could someone live with Hugh Jackman and take *forever* to realize kissing should be going on?!?!

  • Laura

    Mock: thank you for letting me park myself here today for this impromptu open forum on all things related to “Someone Like You” and Ashley Judd. Rachel: yes, definitely, an excellent point. Even the ending had to be reshot (check out Ashley’s ever-so-slightly different hair) — the big kiss — though I’m not exactly sure why now (I have no memory; something about there being two different endings; guess I should watch the DVD so I know what the hell I’m talking about next time I start commenting on my movie…).

    Back to you again, Mock: a book deal. You deserve one. Though right now is a bad time in publishing to try for one. Any ideas for what the book would be? Fiction? Non-fiction? I’m assuming whatever it would be about would include your signature mocking…

  • Laura

    OK, so as long as I’m here, I’m going to change the subject briefly to comment on your MOST IMPRESSIVE traffic and readership! I might have published a novel that Ashley Judd acted in (claim to fame, especially here), but I’ve got nothing on your numbers. In case you’re wondering how I know how impressive your blog traffic is, it’s because I have one of those Feedjit counters on mine. Most of the time there’s nothing much on there, but today it’s a steady stream of people coming from here….

  • Pris

    I did! & by the way…. cool!

  • Mockarena

    Laura – we’ve got a few truly faithful – it’s true. I’m very happy to have the solid support of like 57 readers. And they are all sick of me harassing them to spread the word about The Mock Dock, so I’ll only do it one more time.

    SPREAD THE WORD, PEOPLE! And tell them famous author Laura Zigman visits here!!! 🙂

  • thatgirl

    Hi Laura. Thanks for stopping by and gigglin’ with us. Mockarena never fails to entertain. NEVER.

  • Christine

    Mock, I saw your comment on Laura’s site. You left out the word “the” in your website address. Can you edit your comment?

  • Mockarena

    Ooo – good catch Christine – I tried to edit it but can’t. 🙁 Hopefully with the additional link I put in that comment plus Laura’s trackbacks in her post, people will find us ok. 🙂

  • Olivia J. Snarkypants

    I’ll confess I own “Someone Like You”. I will even confess that I have stated, “Ooohhh…Ashley Judd is in this movie.” in a good way. However, I never did any investigating or research into who she was. Now I find her annoying and wish the lead in “Someone Like You” went to someone totally cool like Laura Linney.

  • Chelsea

    Hey mock- you could write your very own autobiography like sanja-whatever his name is. Only you would have fun things to talk about like your suki and mini and wii. I’d buy it.:o)

  • http://sadlyoutofdate Colleen

    Just here to comment that I love The Mock Dock and that it’s all thanks to Laura that I’ve found it! Thankfully, I had already found Laura.
    Is it possible to be talented and nice? Yes, and Laura proves that. Which makes me remember my first and only encounter with Ashley Judd. I had seen Someone Like You and thought Ashley was beautiful. She is actually more gorgeous in person. Standing in front of her with my young niece, who was seeking an autograph, I told her that she was pretty. She didn’t have to say, “Thank you.” or acknowledge me or the comment—but she didn’t have to give me an evil, hate filled look, either. She is neither talented nor nice.
    Yes, the role should have gone to Laura Linney and yes Ashley did eat constantly in that movie. I think she was trying to dispel any notion one might have about an eating disorder.
    I think she might consider making amends to mankind. Why is she here????

  • Mockarena

    WELCOME COLLEEN!!! 🙂 You wouldn’t believe how many stories like yours I’ve heard about Ashley. She’s a BEAST. It’s why you’ll rarely find a picture of her looking GOOD on the Mock Dock. 🙂

  • Laura Z

    OH GOD, Colleen! (That’s my sister-in-law. And close close friend. Proving one of the rare times that family-members can actually be GOOD for you). I remember the “after-party.” Ridiculous! She was wearing some goofy ice-blue satin number and frankly should have been flattered by your compliment. Or at least PRETENDED to be flattered, since she’s an ACTOR…

  • Hannah955

    So, three years after the fact as I work forward through 28 pages of snark about Ashley Judd, I have to give a shout out to Laura Zigman who, when Ashley Judd wrote her essay about her puffy face entitled “The Conversation” – Laura Zigman absolutely nailed it with her video on her blog about how Ashley Judd keeps talking about how people should stop talking about her puffy face – while she keeps talking about her puffy face.

    And, that essay was the reason that I found the Mock Dock. Ashley Judd was never really on my radar before, but when I heard she had written some groundbreaking brilliant feminist essay about – whatever – I went looking for it, and could not believe how badly written it was. Think, very sincere but kinda naive high school student who has a crush on her English teacher and is trying too hard to impress him. And rehashing such trite ideas about misogyny and our beauty culture and the “patriarchy” – yawn. All this from someone whose very career depended on how she looked, and not to mention when she wrote it she was under contract to TWO companies that were all about appearances – H Stern Jewelers and Estee Lauder’s American Beauty.

    The latter of which has – we learned thanks to Mockarena – recently SCRUBBED any trace of her off their web site – woot!

    And then, I found her memoir at the public library, and my irritation turned to flat-out loathing. You would think that if you controlled every single word written about you in a full-length book you could spin your public image any way you wanted to, and yet, she is so completely tone-deaf about how she appears to people, that she manages to come off as one of the most narcissistic people who ever walked the face of the earth.

    So, I googled “Ashley Judd” + “pretentious” and found the Mock Dock!

    By the way, she has recently claimed that she is fluent in French and Italian, and also that she can speak French in Pig Latin. Or Pig Latin in French. And that she was learning Czech but was awful at it but since she was trying to fly a helicopter at the same time, she gave herself a pass. Mock has mocked that too.

    So, since I myself speak some French and Italian, I went looking for video on the internet of her speaking French. And could not find any. I could find lots of web sites that list celebrities who speak foreign languages, and she was listed on them, and I found a video that goes alphabetically with clips of about 20 actors speaking foreign languages, but she’s not ANYWHERE speaking French on the internet.

    And you have to believe, with her ego, that if her French were actually decent, she’d have manufactured an opportunity to wow us all.

    So, I watched “Missing” (as a drama it was a great travelogue) … and I think in the entire show she spoke one line of French, and I forget what it was, and one line of Italian (“Dove il mio FIGLIO?” – “Where is my SON?”) …

    And then, of all places, she’s on Craig Ferguson one night and either he mentions Wynonna or she does, and she says “Que voce” (“what a voice” in Italian) and I’m thinking – and exactly WHO is supposed to understand this? The Scottish host? The American audience? What is the point of her breaking into Italian at that point?

    OK, I’ll stop there!!!

  • Hannah955

    PS I found it interesting that some of these Hollywood actors speak passable French, German, Italian, etc. Of course, Sandra Bullock speaking German is no surprise because her mother was born in Germany. But Colin Firth speaks Italian! And Jodie Foster speaks fluent French, and passable Italian.

    Here’s a couple of videos (none with Ashley Judd however):

  • Mockarena

    I have actually seen a video of her speaking french while on one of her humanitarian trips – and she overdoes the accent and throws in english words with a heavy french accent when she doesn’t know the Actual Word in french.

    She’s a BEAST.

  • Hannah955

    Ooh, Mockarena, if you ever come across it again will you post it or send it to me? I am not fluent in French but if I listen to it I will be able to tell how good her accent is, and I’m dying to know!

    I know she majored in French (or French lit) at UK but I doubt she developed fluency there, it’s almost impossible to do that without total immersion in the culture, and it’s likely that even her teachers at UK weren’t native speakers. I did see somewhere that she used to spend every spring in Paris … but even so, whether that was enough for her to develop a good accent, and some fluency, really depends on her native ability to learn languages, and that is VERY individual. I’ve known some Americans who lived in France for years (a high school friend of mine developed Euro Disney) … and had horrible American accents, and then other people go over there for a few weeks and they’re talking like natives.

  • JanetEl

    You know what’s funny? I watched Someone Like You back when I was still an Ashley fan, and one of the reasons why I liked the movie was BECAUSE she was eating in almost every scene!

    Oh, how things have changed.

    I now can NEVER watch another Ashley interview ever again. I’m not joking. I’m not making this up. I tried to watch something last night, and couldn’t do it. I was cringing even before the video started playing.

    About Ashley not ending a sentence with a preposition – in one of the interviews she did for SLY, she said “Ray is the man with whom I fall in love.” – so, does that mean that he’s the one that you go out WITH?!

  • JanetEl

    Oh, and Jodie Foster speaks brilliant French. Like a native. That was confirmed every native French-speaker I’ve asked who’s heard her speak. Bravo Jodie! Wish I could speak like her!

  • JanetEl

    confirmed *by* every native French speaker. Oops!

    Like Hannah said, there are people who live in the country and immerse themselves in the culture but still can’t speak the language well, and then there are people who’re only there for a few weeks and speak it really well. I wish I could be like that!

    I don’t know if Ashley even cares about the French language. I think she just wants to be able to speak it (without putting in the effort and studying it properly) so she could sound more cultured and have non-French-speakers envy her.

  • Amy

    Who the heck is she making that bizarre face to in the photo? Nobody is even looking at her.