Monthly Archive for December, 2008

Page 2 of 13

Sarah Palin Is A Grandma

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Bristol Palin had herself a baby boy yesterday, and she named him Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston, because she has inherited her mom’s baby naming style.

Stupidest Rumor Ever

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If this is remotely true, Jennifer Lopez is getting her own I Hate category on this website.

According to this, Jennifer and Marc are going to announce their plans to divorce right after they perform a last duet together at his concert in NYC, on February 14th.  Yeah.  On Valentine’s Day, they will sing an emotional farewell duet together, and then announce to the world that they’re breaking up.

This is either the most ridiculous rumor ever, OR Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are the most attention-whoring couple on the planet.  Either is likely, so I’m waiting till after V-Day to make any judgment call about it.

If this marriage, her 3rd or 4th I believe, ends in divorce, I would like to offer the following observation to Jennifer:

Yeah.  It’s you.

You Know How Normally Billy Mays Is Like, One Of The Most Annoying People Ever?

Not in this ad. In this ad I love him. He’s way less soul crushing.

Katie Holmes Continues To Insist On Pushing Stupid Fashion Trends On Us.

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Seriously?  Jorts with stirrup tights and heels?  This is what fashion has been reduced to?

At least she doesn’t look like death just swallowed her up and vomited her back out, like she’s looked in the past few photos I’ve posted.  I’ll give her that.  But this outfit is criminal.

I Accidentally Want One Of These

As per usual, I was TOTALLY CAPTIVATED by an infomercial I saw this past weekend for the Trikke (pronounced Trike). It’s this 3-wheeled scootery, bikey thing that looks like a total blast to ride. I have informed Mr. Mock that I absolutely MUST HAVE ONE, but he is certain that it’s going to become nothing more than an object in our garage that I will end up mocking.

I found this great video about them, which has solidified my desire to have one for myself.

KIDDING! Actually I just thought the video was funny, and my desire to have one for myself was solidified by the aforementioned infomercial I saw this past weekend.

Do you guys know anything about this Trikke thing? Has anyone tried it? I’m willing to fork over the dough (after tax refund time) to try it out and potentially mock it, but before I do, I want your expert opinions first. Do you think it looks gay? Should I get it?

Um, You Know You Know You Know You Know Who I Am Not A, You Know, Um, Fan Of?

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Caroline Kennedy.  This whole business of her wanting Hilary’s senate seat is just annoying.  But not as annoying as the way she talks.  Case in point, a quote from an  interview with her conducted by the Daily News.

I’m really coming into this as somebody who isn’t, you know, part of the system, who obviously, you know, stands for the values of, you know, the Democratic Party.  I know how important it is to, you know, to be my own person. And, you know, and that would be obviously true with my relationship with the mayor.”

Eloquent.

Caroline could be up against Atty General Andrew Cuomo for the senate seat.  And she had this to say about him: 

Andrew is, you know, highly qualified for this job.  He’s doing a, you know, a great job as attorney general, and we’ve spoken throughout this process. You know, I think, you know, we’re sort of, uh, sharing some of this experience. And um, as I’ve said, he was a friend, a family member, and um so, and uh obviously, he’s, you know, he’s also had an impressive career in public office.”

Caroline is, you know, totally just thinking that, you know, she’s going to be handed this seat because of her, um, you know, famous name.

HATE.

Jay Mohr Likes A Full Lip

Jay Mohr, who’s married to Nikki Cox, has recently legally changed his name to Jon Ferguson Cox Mohr.   A nice gesture, but such a lost opportunity for awesomeness – I mean, can you imagine if he’d reversed the order of their two last names?  How fantabulous that could have been?

Anyway, Nikki Cox used to be pretty much gorgeous.  Behold:

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Now, however, she appears to have replaced her lips with two giant slugs. 

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And without lipstick or other make-up:

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Another perfect example of why you shouldn’t fix what isn’t broken.

In Case You Were Wondering, I Still Hate The UAW

Seriously – what a pile of steaming crap the UAW is.

You know what they own?  A $27 milion resort in Michigan, which includes a $6 million golf course. 

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And you know how much money the resort brings in annually?  Zero dollars.  That’s because, just in the last 5 years alone, it has LOST TWENTY THREE MILLION DOLLARS.  Yeah.  And these jackasses are getting our tax dollars now, as part of the bailout.  So you and I are going to help save their giant extravagant resort.  YAY US!

The UAW leadership claims to need the resort to host seminars and junkets and retreats.  They need to offer courses on leadership, political action, and civil rights.  Members are sent there to “learn, experience unionism (and) commit to labor’s cause,” according to their Web site. I wonder if the “labor’s cause” has been revised lately to include raping the American tax payer.  Jerks.

You know what my company does when they want to host seminars and retreats? They rent out space at a hotel down the street.

HATE HATE HATE the UAW.  HATE.

Attention Commoners: Beautiful People Have Become Engaged.

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Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen are engaged, after he proposed on a private jet, according to TMZ.  The ring, while not referenced in the newsstory, is probably 17 baskillion carats.

Guess Who’s Coming Out With Her Own Hair Extension Line?

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Yeah.  Of all the products that Britney Spears could choose to develop her own line for, couldn’t she have chosen something she’s actually GOOD at using?  I would sooner buy a Britney-authored book on how to pass the bar than I would buy her line of hair extensions.

Again.  Behold:

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