I hate hate hate hate Mariah Carey so much.  She and her husband dressed up like a slutty firefighter and a firefighter, respectively, for Halloween.  You know what she needs, besides like 42 pounds of oil control powder?  A punch in the face.

You know what else I hate?  I hate that halloween costume stores are FILLED with slutty versions of almost every profession, and only slightly stocked with regular versions of professions.  You can be a slutty nurse, or a slutty pilot, or apparently, a slutty firefighter, but if you want to just look like an ACTUAL nurse or pilot or firefighter, you’re basically SOL.  This is why I wore a nun costume this year.  Because it’s kinda hard to sluttify a nun, plus you can eat a lot and not worry about having to hold your stomach in.  So win-win.

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  • Zachary

    Seriously, a nun? That’s either awesome or sacrilege, I can’t decide.

    By any chance, Mockarena, have you heard of a calendar called Nuns Having Fun? It’s the absolute best. It features nuns on scooters, roller skating, etc.

  • http://www.myspace.com/dorkymcspazatron Olivia J. Snarkypants

    Apparently, once a woman becomes an adult, all she wants to be is slutty. I was Dorothy for Halloween. We had to pay to not wear our regular uniforms and dress up. My COMMANDER made comments that I got my costume at an “adult store” and one of the airmen didn’t know who I was because I guess the RED SHOES, low pig tails and Dorothy dress weren’t enough. He thought I was just trying to look like a prostitute. The dress came down to my knees and the sleeves went to my elbows. I am less covered in my Blues. I don’t know why men automatically think Skank when they see costumes. Gah!

  • DM

    You can sluttify a nun outfit….make her look pregnant. Not that I would…just saying one could.

  • megan yore

    I dont know for suuuure, but it might be possible the whole using Halloween as an excuse to be as naked as possible in public without being naked thing came from sluts in southern California. I moved here from Illinois and my first Halloween was like the scene from Mean Girls. amazing.

  • http://www.meatlovingvegan.wordpress.com elizabeth.

    Oh, I have some pics to send you from the party I went to last night. No lie, my friend and I looked at them and she turned to me and said: I do believe that’s mockworthy. I’ll email them when I get them uploaded…

  • Jordon

    Should of been in the lower in NYC (the Village,Tribecca) last night, I got to say as a guy I wasnt complaining, but slutty was an understatment…I don’t think I saw a Nun the entire night.

  • amanda