Monthly Archive for August, 2007

Robbie Continues To Be Straight

It’s old, but sooooooooooo good. Observe, Oh Ye Doubters of Robbie’s Straightness – the looks he gives Nicole. The make out session at the end.

Mmmm – so hot!!!!

Britney Has a New Song. And It’s Every Bit as Bad as You Would Think.


Britney has released a couple of her new “songs” and they’re starting to get airplay.  And the main single, “Gimme More” starts out with the words “It’s Britney, Bitch.”

Need I say more?

Ok, one more thing.  See the expression on her face above?  That was what I looked like when I listened to the single. 

I Heart Monkeys.

I love monkeys. I love their cute little opposable thumbs. I love their inquisitiveness and mischievousness. I love their little hoots and shrieks. And on some deeper level, I envy monkeys. They get to be as disgusting as they want, and everybody still loves them. What other creature has that luxury?

So I offer this article as a salute to the monkeys of the world. Monkeys, this story captures the very essence of what makes you…YOU.

David Beckham Gets Another Owie


Injury-prone David Beckham had to retire from a Wednesday game against a Mexican team after he collided with an opposing player.  Contrary to what you might think happened given the picture above, the owie ended up being a sprained KNEE, and not a sprained wee-wee.

I’m still looking for a report on whether these two became extricated from one another.  I’ll keep you posted.

Keira Knightley Does Not Have an Eating Disorder


Keira Knightley showed up to some event the other day looking like this.  Apparently a few months ago she got all mad at some tabloid for implying that she was TOO THIN (the nerve!!!), and that perhaps she could possibly have an eating disorder of some kind.  This insinuation enraged her, you see.

I suppose if I looked like this, I would resent someone for suggesting I had anything to do with eating as well. 

Girlfriend Got Her Weave On, and It Itches Like a MoFo.


And you thought she was just bad at dressing herself.  Apparently, Brit Brit has forgotten that generally when you wear colored contacts, it’s helpful to wear the SAME COLOR IN EACH EYE. 

I’m starting to think that this is all part of some grand scheme of Britney’s to make the public believe she’s out of money.  She can’t afford pants, two contacts, OR a proper weave.  Maybe she just wants to pay less child support!

Britney Spears Wants You to See Her Ass. Again.


Seriously.  I know it’s Britney Spears and that she’s an already established crazy person.  But how does she get dressed in the morning and think that this is remotely ok for public outings?  HOW?  It’s not like she even has a great ass.  Even women with great asses generally think about wearing something more than just a shirt when they go out.

The Richest Dog Ever


According to the New York Daily News,  Leona Helmsley cut two grandchildren out of her $4 billion dollar fortune, and left TWELVE MILLION DOLLARS to her stupid lapdog named Trouble.  This dog even made out better than her brother, who got a paltry $10 million.

How does one go about even spending twelve million dollars on a lapdog?  You could give it caviar every day and have it drink Dom Perignon instead of water, and drape it with diamonds and STILL not be able to spend that.

It really makes you stop and question where you are in life when a maltese is wealthier than you.

Hi! We’re Gay!


Dude on the right is Lance Bass’s ex-boyfriend.  And he’s clearly upgraded.  Their whole relationship, however,  is probably based around discussing how to work their ab, pec and bicep muscles.  That is, when they’re not having pillow fights and picking out wallpaper.

Jenna Jameson is VILE


There was no way I could see this picture and not share the horror.  I don’t like suffering alone.

Interestingly, she was recently quoted in US Weekly as saying she was through with porn.  Apparently she has reconsidered.

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