Monthly Archive for August, 2006

Before We Were Famous: 5

Three separate examples of hilarity: conversations between Mockarena and Bunny:

IM Conversation between Bunny and Mockarena – in which protective film is discussed.

Bunny: do you know what drives me crazy about Mr. Bunny?
Mockarena: what
Bunny: he never removes the protective film from things. like cell phone screens or monitors or washer controls. that’s the funnest part of getting new gadgets – removing the protective film. and he won’t do it.
Bunny: i have his phone and totally want to peel off the films
Bunny: but he will be mad so i can’t
Mockarena: he’d actually be mad
Bunny: he would ACT mad
Bunny: don’t you always remove the films?
Mockarena: ALWAYS
Bunny: OF COURSE
Mockarena: like, practically before I’ve even paid for it
Bunny: we should totally have our own seinfeld show
Bunny: this is such seinfeld material
Mockarena: you should blog about it
Mockarena: blog about protective films and your husband’s lack of peelage
Mockarena: it’s the best post idea ever
Bunny: perhaps i shall

IM Conversation between Bunny and Mockarena – in which mom pants and bloating are discussed.

Bunny: i am SO bloated
Mockarena: yeah
Mockarena : me too
Bunny: it is unbearable
Bunny: like, my pants all feel like mom pants
Mockarena: I was JUST thinking that I have a total mom body anymore
Bunny: STFU – you do not!
Mockarena: I’m wearing a total mom outfit today
Mockarena: not OUR mom
Mockarena: but mom in general
Bunny: i will inspect and judge you
Mockarena: ok
Bunny: i’m sure you don’t look mommish
Mockarena: I do
Bunny: I DO today
Mockarena: I will inspect and judge you
Bunny: beige capris and a sailor shirt. TOTAL mom
Mockarena: ME TOO
Mockarena: only not a sailor short
Mockarena: but beige capris
Mockarena: and a CARDIGAN for god’s sake
Bunny: mine are total mom-cut too
Bunny: we sound like a sears catalog
Mockarena: or montgomery ward
Bunny: is that place even open anymore?
Mockarena: no
Bunny: motgomery ward – that’s hilarious
Bunny: yes, we bought our outfits at MG, then headed over to service merchandise for a toaster
Bunny: and Hook’s for some hair color
Bunny: and then GL Perry’s
Mockarena: all in time for the early bird special at MCL
Mockarena: omg GL Perry’s
Mockarena: I completely forgot about that place
Bunny: i just listened to Total Eclipse of the Heart. This station ROCKS

IM Conversation between Bunny and Mockarena – in which pleasantries are exchanged.

Bunny: hello
Mockarena: greetings
Bunny: how are you today
Mockarena: well, thank you. And you?
Bunny: i also am well thank you
Mockarena: Excellent news.
Bunny: have you any grey poupon
Mockarena: I have not. however, I might suggest a cognac for later.
Bunny: very well then. i shall join you, and wear my smoking jacket

Before We Were Famous: 4

Yet another example of why you couldn’t live without us:

IM Conversation between Dame and Holmes, in which acronyms are discussed.

Dame: I just typee-dooed something to [Name omitted to protect the innocent], and she wrote “LMAO”
Dame: grrrrrr
Holmes: NSD…IINHFMTBTSWUTA
Holmes: (No she didn’t…it is not hard for me to believe that she would use the acronyms)
Dame: Oh yeah
Dame: I should have put “MTITTIRF”…translation: “me too, I think that is really funny”
Dame: or “BMIALAW”…”believe me, I am laughing as well”
Holmes: or…TISFTIBMSATUOAM (that is so funny that I burst my spleen and threw up on a midget)
Dame: haha
Dame: or STCYBHFTRI?ICTI…”seriously though, can you believe how funny that really is? I can’t take it”
Holmes: Don’t you wonder why our lingo doesn’t seem to catch like wild fire on the Internet scene?
Dame: I know
Dame: Like the sneeze guy? We have funny stories like that ALL of the time!
Holmes: I know….TASFTIWTDTHWAWWHITMOTI (they are so funny that I want to dance the hula with a window washing hobo in the middle of the intersection)

Before We Were Famous: 3

Yet another IM chain…

IM Conversation between Mockarena and Holmes – in which an assignment is given:

Mockarena: I have given Dame an assignment, and would like you to also participate.
Holmes: okay
Mockarena: Your assignment is: By the end of the day, try to look at the top of (Name deleted to protect the innocent, but let’s just say it’s someone with backwards roots)’s head, and explain the coloring issue there.
Holmes: I will make an attempt
Mockarena: See that you do.
Mockarena : Good day then.
Holmes: and to you
Mockarena (LATER): any progress on the assignment?
Holmes: sorry none
Mockarena : well then. You now have one demerit.
Holmes: Like demerits have ever ruffled my feathers before
Mockarena: Well, these are double secret superbad demerits.
Holmes: those seem like pretty serious demerits… I will take them seriously…
Mockarena: As well you should.

Before We Were Famous: 2

One of thousands of IM chains that is the reason we had to create this site:

IM Conversation between Mockarena and Holmes – in which the question, “Can cars hear you” is answered:

Mockarena: Question.
Holmes: yes
Mockarena: Do you think there is any possibility that cars can somehow hear what I’m saying about them, and subsequently lash out at me?
Holmes: justice is always served cold… or without air in a rubberized, circular protuberence
Mockarena: I have no idea what you just said
Holmes: I think you had better make that car some hot cocoa and wrap it in a quilt
Holmes: it needs to feel at home with you
Mockarena: Anyway, I think I might just be the anti car-whisperer
Holmes: ha

Before We Were Famous: Volume 1

An old email chain which proves the need for the creation for this website:

BUNNY:
Here is an ALZHEIMERS’ EYE TEST

Count every ‘ F’ in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE
SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI
FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH
THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS…

(SEE BELOW)
HOW MANY?
WRONG, THERE ARE 6 — no joke.
READ IT AGAIN !
Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F’s before you scroll down.

The brain cannot process ‘OF’.

Incredible or what? Go back and look again!!

Anyone who counts all 6 ‘F’s’ on the first go is a genius.

Three is normal, four is quite rare.

Send this to your friends.
It will drive them crazy!
And keep them occupied
For several minutes!

 

MOCKARENA:

I am officially a genius. I got all the F’s. YAY ME

HOLMES:

I did too… we should join the F’ing circus

BUNNY:

F is for…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

MOCKARENA:

Famfocks?

DAME:

Fabulous Fanny Failing to Fit

BUNNY:

Futtocks.

HOLMES:

Famine Relief

 

 

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